I’m still in my post-vegan weight gain phase. I’ve been heading to the gym very regularly and due to falling back last weekend, I’ve been able to get back to a.m. runs. This is something I haven’t been able to do since I started my new job about three months ago. I am definitely a morning runner. I have no issue going to the gym after work, even though it takes some convincing some days, I go more often than not. As for running, there is no problem with me bouncing out of bed in the am, but it if I have to run after work, there is a 99% chance it won’t happen. As a result, there was minimal to no training for either of my races last weekend.
With all the exercising, I’ve been paying close attention to what I eat and I’ve been weighing myself regularly. I’ve been disappointed each and every time I’ve stepped on the scale, because my weight would not change. No amount of salad or gym time seemed to be able to change my weight in the slightest. I was starting to get upset. I could hear that voice in my head: If you went back to weight watchers you could lose the weight. I’ve said it before, weightwatchers is effective, but I feel like I do’t know how to maintain my weight on my own. I’ve put my foot down, this time I’m not going back. I thought this week, I’d reached my limit, after a I woke up Wednesday and still nothing. I’d had a really good run Tuesday morning and my eating had been stellar. Then I had a thought, Who said you had to weigh 142 lbs? Well no one had. 145 had been my goal when I started WW and after some time, I had naturally setteled at 142. But had I been happy at that weight? That’s a tough question. While on WW, I was doing a lot of running, but at the same time, being vegan meant no fast food, no cake, no donuts. Being vegan was no fun.
Was this why I had quit?
I was making breakfast while these thoughts ran though my head. As a Non vegan, I had a lot more food options at my disposal. Granted, I’m still not sure if I’ll be a non-vegan forever. I still don’t think an omnivore diet is sustainable for the planet and I worry about the incidence of heart disease and other health woes. But when I thought about my meal choices for the day before, I hadn’t regretted a thing. And it had included 3 bite sized snicker bars. I love Halloween candy. The truth of it was, I was happy. With three straight days of exercise under my belt, I felt amazing and I was sleeping a lot better too. Granted, I was not at the best weight, and by best, I mean expected-of-myself weight. But I was exercising, my plates still had green on them, and I felt good.
I decided that if the weight never fell off, at least I would be healthy based on exercise. After all, my weight did not show the full picture. Last weekend, I ran two races, one on Saturday, and the other on Sunday, 13 miles combined, and I did not die. In fact, I was faster on Sunday than I was on Saturday with little to no training for either race. I’m healthy. Who cares about a number? Clearly I did, but I’m learning to let that go.
Then Friday morning, I woke up and realized I’d lost a pound. I smiled and then ate too much frozen yogurt Friday night. No regrets.